What’s Going On?
Our lives and relationships can be full of joy and mutual respect rather than pain and fear. If you sometimes feel confused about your situation, think about these questions. Your responses could tell you a lot about what’s really going on.
Do You …
- Proudly announce you’ve applied for a job or worry what will happen if your partner finds out?
- Always have an equal say about how money is spent or rarely have any say at all?
- Tell your partner if something bothers you or try not to “rock the boat?”
- Feel confident your partner supports you or feel constantly put down?
- Enjoy your partner’s company when you’re together or wonder what you’ll “do wrong” this time and how you’ll “pay for it?”
- Believe you’re strong and capable or what your partner often tells you, which is that you’re crazy or never do anything well enough?
- Feel your partner respects your thoughts and ideas or that they always find something wrong with your viewpoint?
- Feel loved and cherished when you and your partner make love or that you’re being coerced?
- Feel pressured by your partner to do things you don’t want to do?
- Worry you’ll be hurt, physically or emotionally, by your partner?
- Talk on the phone or visit with your friends and family whenever you want or feel anxious or afraid you might “get caught” when you do?
- Believe your home is a warm, secure, and relaxing place to be or that you’re always walking on eggshells?
- Feel unsure that you, your children, or pets are safe?
If you most often chose the second half of each question, chances are your partner is abusive. Even if they haven’t hit you, it’s still abuse. Call our helpline at 1-800-439-2323 to talk to someone about what’s going on.